Simon's Blog

The feeling of tiredness and restlessness has been following me since Monday. It just won't go away. I guess it is not about the rest I got. Rather it is about the things I am facing recently, may it be emotional or career.

Time. Something that we can't control yet given. It is said that we are given 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 30 days a month and 12 months a year. And the irony is that we are not the one in control. Time moves on itself, by the seconds, minutes and hours. As of now, it is already end of August, going to September. For me, it is yet again another period of time that I am struggling to get by. The burden to balance between work and studies and leisure. It is never going to get any easier. But it is going to get tougher. And I will need to get stronger by the body and the mind to conquer the challenges placed in front of me.

I have not updated my blog for sometime. Not like I am demotivated with the lack of comments, as my blog doesn't spike much topics. But I am away for a short break over the weekend. And I came back to KL, still feeling the fatigue and restlessness. Seriously, I need to look for "good" friends. By definition of good, I mean those friends that I can talk to and share my thoughts with. Well, these are some words from a person that is laboured with works and studies.

Being back home is somehow much comfortable for me. I think it is too comfortable that I even stopped working on my assignments. And I am having 3 classes this coming weekend. Anyway, I have enjoyed my time in Penang. And I guess I should be working on 1 piece of my assignments starting tonight. Well, since I am just back from celebrating my friend's birthday. I would go for a shower then only start working on my assignment. To all my Muslim friends,  have a wonderful holiday and enjoy the food and family gathering. See you all after the Raya break.

Guess it has happened to me that I am faced with a situation that I won't know how to describe. It has nothing to do with work as work is just work. Recently, I am drawn to think of the life that I lived. I am particularly drawn to think about: Should I be living single or should I get attached with a partner? It is not easy to make such a decision. But nonetheless, it is a decision to be made. PS: I am not going to come up with a title for this post, as I don't think I will have a suitable  title to describe my feelings and my emotions about this post. :p

So it is just around a corner for our Muslim friends to get themselves ready for the Raya celebration. Things have been busy for me in the office. Ad hoc orders come in like nobody business. Some of colleagues are going to take a week off. I am going to spend this time back at my hometown. But I will be working on Thursday. Talking about spending time back at my hometown. This is not going to be a vacation for me as I will need to prepare my assignments. Assignments are due on Sept 11, 2012. Time is running short for me and I will need to get myself ready to submit the assignments. It is a pain for me as I have to re-do one of assignments (as I have failed that paper). It is much stressful for me as I come closer in preparing the assignments. But it is not going to be much complaint as I will need to own up to my work and responsibilities. I am still feeling the flu. Got a recommendation from my friend. I am going to test the medication and have a good night rest. Do...

It has been almost a week since I seen a doctor and taken my medication. Recovery has been slow. It may have been due to me going to gym in the evening, despite not fully recover yet. Well, no pain no gain. Yesterday was a pain in the ass for me. Traveled all the way to Subang Jaya only to feel the fatigue. In the end, I have to skip class after attending the lecture for 2 and a half hours. Coming back home to catch a 2-hour sleep. Waking up this morning, I was feeling bit weak. But it is better now after taking some breakfast and blogging about it. PS: I am still going to gym this evening nonetheless. :p

It has been 2 days since I last saw the doctor. At first, it is just viral infection. Then it became diarrhea. And this morning, flu symptoms came on-board. Speaking of which, I would need to take my medication now. Just hope that I will get better by tomorrow. I won't want to skip my lessons too much when the datelines are coming up. Workload at the workplace has been manageable. Even now, I do got an inquiry from my senior manager asking me of the situation that I am in. At least he asked. I have had sleepless nights for 2 times this week. It is not helpful to me and definitely bad for my health. But my mind would race around like a speedster when I woke up in the middle of the night. It will always think of someone. Someone that I miss and love to have him around. That is why I wrote to him in the middle of the night, telling him my thoughts. And I read some blogs before I went off to bed, where I spend an hour or so laying awake.

Sick. Starting yesterday night, I have felt my bones aching, muscle aching and joints pain. Muscle aching is due to consistent body building. But viral infection is causing my bones and joints to ache. Time to rest and recuperate.

Tuesday. Second day in a week. Five more days before the week comes to an end. I woke up with a mild headache this morning. It would have been caused by certain interruption last night. Interruption to my sleep. I woke up, thinking of someone. Someone I "feared" to have love. It is funny how your mind will work its way through. And, you go about the next day thinking of that person. I do hope there will come a time for me to share with that person what my thought is. And I hope that day would be sooner.

It is a normal Sunday for me. Nothing seems to be out of place as I went to college for my morning class. Cutting close a bit when I arrived at the destination. Managed to get in before everything starts. It is the lecturing then followed by the review of our assignments. Thank God, I managed to draft out the rough guide last night. Now it is time to sit down and work on the "meat" of the proposal. Went over to Summit for a hearty lunch. Alone again. Took a couple of pics for my memories. Not that I really need them but for reflection's sake. Was pondering if I should go for a book replenishing exercise. And my instinct just brought me there. BookXcess at Amcorp Mall. It was a nice moment to be around bookx again. And managed to get myself 2 new books (which God knows when I will be able to finish them). One thing about me is I love books too much and I got myself too many books at times. And I ended up not able to finish them. Maybe I will do bet...

August 04 - Nothing special about this day. It is Saturday. Slept in. Late breakfast of having 2 cups of soya bean milk. Went in to office for minor errands. Got off to a movie before noon. Yup before noon. Nice story line. But felt the plot could have been better. Finished off my soya bean milk as my lunch. Went to gym to work on my thighs and calves. Coming back home before going around to grab something for dinner. Now, I am bit hungry again when I am finally doing my stuff. Assignment preparation is exhausting. It would take sometime to draft the structure and main points. Well, I guess I better start working on it.

It is Friday morning. The same routine of plucking myself away from my bed (this has been happening since Monday). Weather is cloudy and hazy as usual (due to God-knows-what reason). Just read of a blog this morning ( Takashi ). I can't agree more than what he said about being exhausted and just wanting to laze around (after work, gym & dinner). This is same with me. I have been feeling the drag of most things (especially my current work & my part time studies). The only thing that I am looking forward to will be the gym session at the end of the day.

The mind is wandering and is not in focus since this week started. May it be the stress and fatigue of over-work. Or may it be something else.